An Act of Discipleship: Walking with Christ through Holy Week

Guidance on using the lectionary.

“It is not the act of a good disciple to flee from the cross in order to enjoy an easy piety.”
St. John of the Cross

Several years ago during this season, my family gathered to bury my grandmother. She was 92 years old and greatly loved by many. On Saturday we came together around her casket to see her body one last time, to pray, and say our personal good-byes. On Sunday, we gathered at a small church across from her home to worship and celebrate her life in a more public and formal way. And then on Monday, a few of us made the journey three hours south for her burial.

At one point, I considered going home on Sunday after the funeral because that would have been more convenient. But there was another desire within me, the desire to go the whole way—with my Dad as he walked the path of saying good-bye to his mother and with my grandmother as her body was brought to its final resting place. Even though I knew she was no longer with us in the body, there was something about being present with her body up to and through those final moments that seemed important.

The Gift of Presence

When my grandmother was alive her greatest delight was to have her family around her. When it came time for us to leave, she would always stand on the porch and wave to us, straining for one last glimpse as we disappeared down the street. In fact, the picture that we as grandchildren were given on the day of her funeral was a picture of her waving good-bye from her front porch; it captured something of her heart and her spirit. And so I imagined that maybe on the day of her burial she would see us standing on the porch of this life, straining for one last connection with her before she disappeared from our sight. It seemed like it was something we could do to honor her faithful love for us through the years.

It is this spirit that draws us to walk with Christ as we enter into this Holy Week. It is the desire to stay with a loved one for as long as our presence can bring them comfort and reassurance. It is the commitment not to leave them alone as the darkness deepens and also to be there waiting when the light dawns again. As Kathleen Norris has noted, this is the week Christians give themselves most fully and completely to worship. And it is a privilege to walk with Christ and to worship him during this most holy week of the Christian Church.

I Call You Friends

The dark night of Jesus’ betrayal and execution began, ironically, with the kiss of a friend. The irony was that Jesus had given such priority to cultivating relationships with his disciples during his brief time here on earth and now this betrayal was taking place within that most intimate circle.

Some of Jesus’ most human moments had to do with his poignant expressions of longing for companionship.    From the very first moment of his life in ministry he invited “those whom he wanted…to be with him,” the Scriptures say in Mark 3. He accepted his ultimate aloneness as we all must, but his longing for intimacy and friendship with those he loved expressed itself in different ways throughout his life.

When his teaching became too challenging and many chose to leave, Jesus turned to his disciples and said, “Will you leave me also?” As their relationships deepened, Jesus said, “I no longer call you servants, I call you friends.” And one of the crowning achievements of his life was that he loved his own until the end. (John 13:1)

Could You Not Stay Awake With Me One Hour?

Perhaps the most compelling expression of Christ’s longing for companionship was his request for his disciples to accompany him to the Garden of Gethsemane and to pray with him through the dark night of his betrayal and death. (Matthew 26: 36-37) There was something about knowing that his friends were nearby that was a strength and a comfort. He invited Peter, James and John, whom he had come to trust the most, to come farther than the others.

As he began to grieve more openly and to struggle with what was before him, he asked his intimate ones to stay awake with him. He must have known how hard it is to stay awake and present to someone else’s pain but he asked them anyway. He knew the human tendency to “check out” when the human struggle becomes too much to bear. Only those who are closest stay through the end.

Going all the Way

Every year at this time, we have the opportunity to “go all the way” in reliving the events of Jesus’ last days here on this earth. Like the first disciples, we have the opportunity to choose, as best we can, to deepen our friendship with Christ by communing with him throughout the events of these days and learning from him as we walk each step of the way. From the triumph of Palm Sunday to the darkness and death of the crucifixion to the victory of the Resurrection we are intentional about seeking ways to walk with Christ, responding to his deep and consistent desire to be with those he loved—particularly during the time of his agony. This is an act of love and friendship with Christ. It is the gift of staying present with him during the hardest and most unnerving part of his journey because he has asked us to remain near him, awake and alert. It is the gift of ourselves, which is the truest gift we have to give.

To walk with Christ through the events of Holy Week is a challenging invitation, to be sure, for it is an invitation to learn how to be like Christ, not just during the triumphs of Palm Sunday-type experiences when everything is as we hoped it would be. It is easy to follow Christ then—to enjoy the pomp and circumstance, the good will and limelight.

It is much harder to stay faithful to living with Christ and learning to be like Christ in the midst of betrayal, violence, pain, struggle, and death. There is a part of us that shrinks from this part of the journey, preferring to skip right to the Resurrection! As Barbara Brown Taylor commented, tongue-in-cheek, “I want to stop about a day short of following Jesus all the way.”

Walking the Path Together

But the truth is that there are things that we learn by walking this path that we cannot learn in any other way. Some of them are things we do not necessarily want to hear and so they are best taught by Christ himself as we walk the path together. Let us pray together as we enter this Holy Week…

Almighty God, whose most dear Son
went not up to joy but first he suffered pain,
and entered not into glory before he was crucified:
Mercifully grant that we, walking in the way of the cross,
may find it none other than the way of life and peace;
through Jesus Christ our Lord.


Book of Common Prayer

Stations of the Cross Prayer Service

April 14, 2017 at 12:00 p.m. • Learn more


©Ruth Haley Barton, 2007-2017. This article was originally published in 2007 and has been updated for this season. This article is not to be reproduced without written permission from the Transforming Center.

Ruth Haley Barton

Ruth (Doctor of Divinity, Northern Seminary) is Founder and Chief Essence Officer of the Transforming Center. A teacher, seasoned spiritual director (Shalem Institute), and retreat leader, Ruth is the author of numerous books and resources on the spiritual life including Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership, Sacred Rhythms, Life Together in Christ, Pursuing God’s Will Together, Invitation to Solitude and Silence, Invitation to Retreat, and Embracing Rhythms of Work and Rest (Oct 2022).
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This reading reminded me when I was in grade school my church had the Stations of the cross. It was always very long, and warm with the smell of burning candles and incense, kneeling and standing periodically. The pictures and words of the readings of each station was so vivid you could almost imagine being right there with Jesus. My mom always used to say “can I not stay with Jesus for one hour?” Thank you for this meditation, I can’t make your service, this year perhaps some day. Ps thank you for the stations of the cross prayer guide.

I love hearing how the Stations of the Cross impacted you, even as a child. Lovely!

Ruth, thank you for your wisdom, your words, and your Spirit led insights. Is it OK to tell you that I sometimes preach from your writings? They seem to be timely and appropriate to my ministry context. Blessings to you and your entire team.

We welcome people quoting Ruth as long as they give attribution to her and also indicate the source–where the quote can be found.

Great to hear from you, Randy! Thanks for sharing my writings with you congregation. 🙂 Means a lot!

[…] 2. “It is much harder to stay faithful to living with Christ and learning to be like Christ in the midst of betrayal, violence, pain, struggle, and death. There is a part of us that shrinks from this part of the journey, preferring to skip right to the Resurrection!” Read the rest of Ruth Haley Barton’s post, “An Act of Discipleship: Walking with Christ through Holy Week” here. […]

thank you , as always for your insightful thoughts expressed beautifully. I was reminded of one of the titles Christ gave himself: ” Good Shepherd” — walking everyday with his sheep – and his promise, not to leave us as orphans…… how poignant to reflect on our commitment to walk with him, through this week, and onward —- thanks for the blessings .

What a pivotal week….. Palm Sunday followed by Passover being celebrated beginning tonight by our Messianic Jewish friends…….. This week, we are rich in the emotional depth of soul and yes, Ruth, as you say in worship.

Thanks, Ruth, for this reflection as we enter this final and climactic week of Jesus’ earthly life. Altho it feels too soon… I’m still working with “Returning to God with All Our Hearts”! I wonder if it felt too soon for Jesus as well, tho He was so obviously in step with the Father and even provoking the fulfillment of each Scriptural detail. Thank you for the encouragement to walk all the way thru this week with Him. Blessings to you and all the Transforming Community as we do.

Thanks, Janice! And blessings to you as well during this Holy week…

This reflection deeply touched me…that we stay with Christ in His agony. This year it is touching me in a different way than ever before as my husband is going through much suffering due to nearly everything that could possibly go wrong now going wrong after a surgery last year. I don’t know how long he will live. In a sermon I heard two weeks ago, the priest said that in some way we don’t fully understand, when we are looking into the face of one suffering, we are looking into the face of Christ crucified. This has been sustaining me. Likewise, your meditation today will sustain me, as I read it again and again. Thank you, Ruth.

Thank you for sharing this, Sandra. You have been through so much this year and the journey into the unknown continues. I am grateful to hear how God is leading you so precisely to see and know Jesus during such difficult days. As you and Jesus walk this way together, may you know his guidance and his comfort.

The journey is over and he is now free and at peace. Jim entered resurrection life on Easter morning at 3:06 am.

Oh Sandra, I just saw this! I am sorry for your loss and Jim’s resurrected life in Christ! You must be in a swirl of activity now–know that our love and prayers are with you on this leg of your journey.

Ruth, thank you. I so greatly value the prayers of the Transforming Center leadership. All of you are such deeply compassionate people. Life moves now both extremely rapidly and at a snail’s pace.

Ruth these words are such medicine for my tired and broken spirit today. I have been engaged in the “Dark Night of the Soul.” I have been a part of 12 funerals since January, and my wife has just be diagnosed once again with Cancer for the second time in less than two years. I have just been granted a leave from my Pastoral Leadership and I am desperate to spend time with God to refill my tank. My jar is filled with cloudy, mirky water, and I need to have it settle and I need His presence. I know He desires to be with me, and I need the ability to slow down and be with Him. This is such a great reminder! I am so thankful for the resurrection power of Christ that raises us up in this life, that we might come alive again in the journey. Your writings have been such a gift of God to me for over 15 years. Thank you for allowing God to use you to help me “Strengthen my Soul.”

My heart is stirred by what you share here, Bill, and I am grateful these words have met you during days that feel so dark. Holding you in God’s presence even now…may this leave you have been granted be a time of resurrection and new life!

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